You are browsing the archive for 2009 April.

by Admin

Bondage for Beginners: What the "act" is All About

5:55 PM in Relationships, Sexuality by Admin

By: David Tottenham

bondage

BDSM is a pretty compact acronym which stands for bondage and discipline, domination and submission, sadism and masochism. BDSM in general involves a variety of sexual practices and relationships.

For this, however, let us try to focus on the “B” word; bondage. What exactly is it about getting handcuffed which turns some people on? If your sex life is lagging, is bondage really an effective way to add some spice into your love play? Read on to find out more…

When Bound is Not Necessarily Battered

First up, here’s a quick definition of bondage. From the perspective of BDSM, bondage involves tying up or restraining someone to induce sexual pleasure.

There are a few quick facts that you need to know about bondage if you haven’t tried it yet. No matter what your sexual orientation is, you might just be turned on by the sight of your partner with his or her hands cuffed to the bed posts. Perhaps it’s the novelty of the act of bondage, but it can also be the thought of mastering your control over your partner which proves to be a huge turn on.

Another thing that you need to know about bondage is that it is not necessarily the violent nature of the act which provides a strong erotic appeal for most people. Whether you’re on the giving or receiving end of bondage discipline, this will allow you to get lost in a world where your sexual fantasies will come into play.

Bondage Sex Toys for Beginners

Now that you have an idea about the appeal that bondage has to some people, what are the beginner sex toys that you can use to introduce some BDSM into your love play with your partner?

The most basic bondage sex toys that you can try out as a beginner include handcuffs, erection rings and nipple clamps. For the mid-level to advanced level of BDSM, you can graduate to the more sophisticated bondage sex toys which include a full bedroom bondage or fetish kit, spanking paddles, whips, sex furniture, love swings, hammocks and electro stimulation toys.

If you want to up the ante in your sex life, bondage is definitely the way to go. Not only will you be able to fulfill your deepest, darkest sexual fantasies – but you and your partner will be able to connect on a more intimate level in the bedroom that is bound to add that extra spice to your sex life.

About the Author:

David Tottenham works for the Utopia Supplies sex shop, a UK-based online sex shop which stocks thousands of high quality sex toys.

Something above take your fancy? Take a look at the Utopia Supplies bondage section, where you will find a large range of bondage equipment including cock rings, whips, restraints and more

Submit this content to FetSpank.com

by Admin

What is a Fetish and Do You Have One

10:07 AM in Relationships, Sexuality by Admin

By: Francis Githinji

fetish

Some people cannot put a finger on what their fetish is. Some know them but they think they are way too abnormal. What would you say a fetish is? It is word which means false charm, power or object. It is something you are obsessed with. It can be a body part or an object. Your sexual gratification is fixated on a particular thing. It becomes a fetish when you cannot sexually get satisfied unless you fantasize about it. It is so bad that even when you masturbate you must have it in mind and still when you are with a partner sexually it has to be present or somewhere in your imagination. For instance you might find brunettes attractive which is ok but if you cannot get sexually aroused without their presence, then you certainly have a serious fetish for brunettes.

A fetish transfers power from an original object or charm to a substitute. A person who has fetishes is known as fetishist whose operation is outside the circle of what is practically considered to be normal. The variety of fetishes depend on the object where the fetish is placed upon. The known inanimate fetishes are found in three varieties. The first one is a media fetish where the fixation is all about materials such as rubber, silk, latex and leather among others. The second variety is called a form fetish where the obsession is about the shape of the object. A good example of form fetishes are stilettos, knee-high boots and certain lingerie. When the object of obsession involves body parts, the type of fetish is categorized under animate fetishes. They can be breasts, hair, feet butts and any other body part.

People have the capacity of turning anything in to a fetish. There are mild and extreme fetishes. You can be able to assess the degree of your obsessive fixation according to whether it affects your relationships and your daily life. If it interferes with your activities you should seek professional help from a psychologist. Try as much as possible to tame your fetish because when if it goes wild it becomes a mental disorder. A fetish might be triggered by something. We were not born with these obsessions. We acquire them later in life as we develop. A guy admitted that he developed a fetish for tongue rings after being orally pleasured by a woman who had one. The cold abject rubbed against his manhood while her hot mouth was engulfing him. Such a guy is likely not to get sexual gratification by romancing an ordinary girl. He needs one with a tongue ring. Experiences make us develop a fetish.

It is amazing to learn that fetishes are our deep down turn on. We might never talk about them but in your gut you know it. Some men marry beautiful and humble wives while what turns them on is a “bad girl”. A girl with a crazy hairstyle and who can perform any act on them sexually. These idols are in movies and men close their eyes and fantasize about them. If you can watch a certain movie from Monday to Monday every day like there is no tomorrow, you probably have a fetish for that bad girl in the movie. A husband confessed that in order to orgasm, he had to fantasize that he was making love to this “bad girl” in his favorite movie.

About the Author:

Francis K. Githinji Is A Online Dating Expert. His Latest Project A Fetish Shows How The Power Of Online Dating Can Be Harnessed Internationally and With Great Success, Or You Could Post Your Valued Comments On His Blog At A Fetish.

Submit this content to FetSpank.com

by Admin

Dear Boomer. is Your Sex Life Normal?

8:30 PM in Relationships, Sexuality by Admin

By: Andrew clinton

640326968_6e569f9e40.jpg

Do you ever find yourself wondering if your sex life is normal? Do you equate frequency with normalcy? Do you compare your sex life with your friends’? If yes don’t worry you are not alone! A lot us sometimes fret needlessly about our sex-lives and sex-drives, thanks to the numerous myths about sex. The following are some of the most common ones;

Myth- Going straight to Sleep after a romantic dinner is not normal.

Fact- It is in fact perfectly normal to want to sleep after a fulfilling meal. Good food can in fact kill your sex-drive and make you sleepy. It’s actually better to have sex before you set out for a romantic meal!

Myth- It’s not normal if you (women) don’t have an orgasm during intercourse.

Fact- What’s more important than an orgasm is how much pleasure you give each other? You may have enjoyed the fore-play but may still not have an orgasm, don’t worry, its normal! In fact according to some recent research studies most women don’t have an orgasm during intercourse, but it doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy it!

Myth- Men always want sex.

Fact- Completely untrue! Just like women men may not always be in the mood to have sex. In fact this myth is responsible for men’s performance anxiety and sometimes erection trouble as well. It’s because men believe that it’s normal to always want sex and they worry about their being normal, when they don’t want sex!

Myth- It’s not normal to be interested in sex after a certain age.

Fact- False again! It’s biologically and psychologically normal to be interested in sex till the end of your life!

Myth: It’s normal for women to lose their sex-drive after menopause.

Fact- The truth is far from it! Many women actually enjoy sex more after menopause since they no longer have to worry about getting pregnant. Also thanks to hormone replacement therapy (HRT) many women aren’t plagued with the low sex drive and vaginal dryness often associated with menopause.

Myth- You must have sex at least 3 times a week.

Fact- As long as you are both satisfied with the frequency, even if you have sex once in two weeks, it’s normal! Don’t put too much stress on quantity as long as you are both happy with your sex life. If you are not then you will have to talk it out with your partner and figure out the reason for his/her lack of interest.

Finally, good sex is what makes you and your partner happy, everything else is a myth!

Submit this content to FetSpank.com

by Admin

A Pleasure Guide to Bondage

4:39 PM in Syndicated by Admin

with_a_whip_big.jpg

By: Suie Roberts

For the novice, bondage can be a quick and inexpensive way to spice up your sex life. You don’t need to buy any sort of specialised kit. Neck ties, stocking and belts make ideal bonds. Use soft items to bind your lover to avoid chafing.

Of course there is more to bondage than just tying your partner down to the bed. What are you going to do with them now that you have them there? This is why it is perceived that spanking and whipping must be involved. If you like that kind of thing there are a wide selection of Spanking Tools available, however this is sadism and masochism activity.

In its simplest form, bondage can be holding someone’s hands down whilst giving them a lap dance. In this situation there are no restraints at all. Bondage is more about the eroticism of being under the control of another person or the eroticism of having full control over someone else.

Because of this, bondage on any level stimulates the largest sex organ in the body – The Brain. Bondage binds the brain in rules that give the brain the illusion that the body is being restrained and controlled by someone else. It is usually considered that people in high powered jobs like these kind of sexual games, because they are able to let someone else take control so that they can loose control. But it is also fair to say that it is usually imaginative people who enjoy these games, because they are able to get lost inside the game.

Anyone considering practising bondage on any level must have complete trust in the person or persons who they intend to play with. It is also essential that everyone agrees on a ‘safety’ word. The safety word is a word that can be used by anyone to stop all activity immediately. The word could be a television programme, a musician, or complete nonsense such as ‘erotic elephants’. Whatever your safety word, it must only be used when you want to stop all activities and return to reality. It is important to be able to stop the game because someone my get hurt or injured.

Also for safety, don’t tie anyone too tight. During sexual arousal your body slightly swells, so a tight handcuff soon starts cutting off the bloody supply.

Other less brutal activities could involve teasing your partner.

Tips for girls -

Rub your pussy very lightly over his cock whilst rubbing baby oil into your breasts. Lean forward every now and then and let your juicy orbs hang in his face, just out of tongue reach.

Kneel above his chest and masturbate giving him a ringside seat. Rub your fingers over your lips and then go in for the full on snog.

A little forced face sitting, hover the bits of your pussy you want licking over his face.

Tips for the boys -

Get her to stick her tongue out and the stroke her face and neck and tongue with your erection.

Kiss and caress the inside of her thighs slowly, forever moving upwards little by little. Keep your hands moving and occasionally run your hand over her pussy, but don’t linger or give her any sort of satisfaction. Make sure she feels your breathe on her clit, but not your tongue! Not yet anyway.

The games and the teasing all adds to the excitement of bondage sex. The slow build up leads to steamy passionate sex.

After dabbling with bondage you may want to move up a level. This is a great excuse to dress up, whether you dress up as a Dominatrix, or a Submissive Sex Slave or the Devil herself; the key ingredient has to be PVC or Leather.

Top Tip – If you dress kinky and sexy, you feel kinky and sexy.

You may also want to upgrade your bondage restraints

Hand Cuffs – Cold metal feels nice against your skin, however, they do clank and make noise and they can scratch your furnishings, metal beds in particular.

Leather Wrist Restraints – The feel of leather and the look and smell of it is very sexy. Just be aware that leather collars and cuffs do take some ‘wearing in’ because new leather is rather stiff.

Fabric Wrist Restraints – Very comfortable to wear with padded protection. Quick and easy to use, you can tie someone up in the blink of an eye. They don’t damage your bed and are compatible with any kinky inflatable furniture. Fabric binds are easily washed in the washing machine. However, their sex appeal isn’t the greatest.

PVC Bondage Tape – Bondage tape is wonderful stuff. It works in a similar way to Clingfilm so it sticks but not with stickiness, so you can wrap it round your head and it doesn’t scalp you as you take it off. Its quick and easy to use and looks very hot, although you can’t reuse really because the tape stretches and goes funny and doesn’t look as sexy the next time you use it.

Of course, restraints aren’t just designed to tie your lover to the bed. Some restraints are designed so that they connect together, usually with ‘D’ ring (named after their shape). By clipping bondage items together, you can create unusual sex positions that need support, or just hold limbs out of the way for easier access. Cuff her ankles to her wrists, lay her on her back with her legs straight and you have easier access for giving oral and it leaves your hands free for other naughtiness.

The alternative is to buy your collars and cuffs separately. To ooze sex appeal here you really need to go to a specialised retailer and get sexy leather.

3-Ring Slave Collar – Not only do these collars make the wearer look really hot but they are also very versatile. They enable you to cuff hands to neck in front or behind of the wearer, or ankles to neck (obviously not so that it breaks the wearers hips). You can also add a lead for a bit of fun or use the third ‘D’ ring to tie them to the bed. Great fun.

Waist Cuff, Bondage Belt – Bondage belts allow you to tie your lovers hands to their waist, either at their sides or directly in-front or behind them, again with a long piece of rope you could also attach their ankles so that their legs are in the air and spread open. They can also be used to with a piece of rope going from centre front to centre back to form a kind of chastity belt, or to keep a vibrator firmly inside the vagina.

Leather and Steel Restraints – Ankle to wrist restraints are great for deep penetration sex. Cuff her up and then roll her backwards so that her weight rests on her shoulder blades. Tie the Cuffs to the bed to hold and maintain the position.

Inflatable Bondage Chair – Kinky Furniture is the ultimate bondage toy. However, Bondage furniture usually takes up a lot of space and is not easily hidden when out of use. Inflatable bondage furniture on the other hand easily packs away and can be hidden in the wardrobe – a little less sex appeal but saves the kids and your mother from seeing the evidence of your sexual kinks!

In another direction, there is Japanese bondage. With its oriental origins, Japanese bondage is considered by some an art form and if you really get into it you can really create some elaborate patterns. But to start with you probably wont create much in the way of art, but you will have lots of fun.

You may think a bit of old washing line will do the job, but you really cant skimp here. Get Rope intended for the job, or you run the risk of the rope itching and irritating the skin or chafing. If the rope is too thin it cuts into the skin. Considering the delicate places the rope is going to touch – you don’t want to be left with Chinese burns from your Japanese bondage!

You can buy Books about Japanese Bondage, but finding out for yourself is a whole lot of fun. Here are some Top Tips -

Double up your length of rope. Using double thickness makes knot tying easier.

Keep everything symmetrical – this makes for a more pleasing creation to the eye, it also makes things a whole lot easier.

Always start with a G-String style formation. Its good for anchorage points and gives you something to build on

To make the G-String

With doubled length, wrap around the waist as if it were a belt. Feed the surplus rope through the loop created when you doubled the length. Line up this connecting point with the navel.

Pass the rope down and through the legs and up between the buttocks to the middle back of the ‘belt’ and knot.

Now you are ready to go on to the upper body, or pass round to the sides to tie the wrists to the waist. Just let your imagination run riot!

Remember – When practising Japanese bondage do not make the binds too tight, and bare in mind that you will need to be able to untie any knots that you make.

About the Author:

For More Article Visit :: http://www.thearticleinsiders.com/

Submit this content to FetSpank.com

by Admin

A Quick Rundown of Some of the Most Popular Gay Fetishes in America

1:00 PM in Syndicated by Admin

fetish

When it comes to the gay counterculture in America today, there are more gay fetishes around than you can shake a stick at. And to be sure, you can shake a stick at an awful lot of them. Sure, there are plenty of vanilla gay folks out there who do not involve any gay fetishes into their sexual habits, but it seems as though more often than not gay fetishes are involved in homosexual relationships. It can be said that being gay is a fetish in and of itself, but for the purposes of this article, we will just focus on some of the more hard core gay fetishes in the society today.

S and M is one of the more popular gay fetishes around. This involves one partner sexually or emotionally dominating the other, with one or both people involved getting sexual pleasure out of the activity. This particular gay fetish has lots of other stuff involved, such as whips, chains, blindfolds, leather, latex and a whole lot more. And all these are dedicated to hurting the submissive person in one way or another. There are actually a countless number of websites dedicated to this S and M gay fetish, with many heterosexual people engaging in the activity as well.

To find people who are interested in this S and M gay fetish, one only needs to do Google, Yahoo or MSN search and visit one of these websites and befriend the people who are also members of the community. For a real life gay fetish experience of this nature, you can go to an S and M gay fetish bar. There is usually one in just about every major city, so finding one is relatively easy. In more rural areas that do not have S and M gay fetish bars, you can usually find a group of people who are willing to host such events at their homes.

Another popular gay fetish involves bondage. In this gay fetish, one person ties up his or her partner with ropes or chains. This is a common gay fetish for both gays and lesbians, and this often includes blindfolds to enhance the bondage experience. Although related to the S and M gay fetish on a basic level, not all people who engage in bondage play are also into S and M. Yet another gay fetish involves age play, where one partner is significantly older than the other.

Submit this content to FetSpank.com